Pain

And then it comes back to me,
This euphoria of pain.
Companion of this night,
Every night.
The silence of every sound,
The sound of every silence.
Resonating in my eyes
It comes to me.
Just like it never left.
Rejection, refusal, rebuttal,
Thumping itself into existence
With every past pain piling
creating unconquered mountains in my life.
Remember, render, rationalize
Ugliness at its best
Making its mark. Even if it does not exist.
It does exist.
The pain does exist. It only grows.
Then it is outside your being and in your world.
And finally in your breath.
Then you feel heavy, small, insignificant
Misfit.
Tomorrow is another morning
Another day
Another night
Showing you your life
Black & bleak and gory
The pain is again a part of you.